from the bigdumbHoosier Archive - 05.29.2001
Rolling handouts
"Look here thintanCalifornian, quit your grousing about rolling blackouts. We'll solve this with compassionate conservatism...fill out this application, take a urine test, stand in line for three or four hours. If you're poor, and not just some kind of perverted Californicatin' liberal we'll give you a voucher - kind of a rolling handout if you will. You can pass it along to your electrical utility so they'll build new capacity to serve you better".
"But GW, how do we know the utility will spend the money to increase generating capacity?"
"That's the law of supply and demand, ttC. We don't need any of that big government, no sir. Just let the free market be free!"
"Hmmm, I thought that supply shortages caused prices to go up - and isn't electricity one of those inelastic commodities - I mean you pretty much have to pay the bill, and it can't be stored very effectively either..."
"Why I think you're catching on ttC - prices go up, thus rewarding the diligence of private enterprise. That's why I love Texas, errr, I mean America, son!"
"But wait a sec, GW, don't they actually make more money when there's a shortage? So wouldn't the utility guys be better off making less electricity and charging more for it too? Higher unit profits and all...I mean, wouldn't it be smarter for them to invest the extra money in, say, getting you re-elected?"
"Well, I suppose the free market has been distorted somewhat, by all those environmental regulations you know, but we'll get those cleared away so the unseen hand of the market can work its magic, so I wouldn't worry ttC."
"Unseen hand? I think I am beginning to see it. (slapping noise) Ouch, yes, that was it alright."
